Spitting Image

It’s amazing how much men spit in Chennai, so much so that I decided to blog about it. The guy in my rickshaw today spat so much the entire journey that it’s any wonder the guy hasn’t totally dehydrated himself. And we’re not just talking a little excess-fluid spit here, we’re talking about guys hocking-back, real gut-crunching, slime summoning nasal passage activity.

The other day Nikhil and I went to a bookstore called Higginbotham and I found a book called “Why Indian Men Are Ugly”. I laughed so hard when I found this book, not because it was a comical book with things I agreed with but because the author- a female- was being absolutely serious. I found this sweeping generalisation so outrageous, it’s a wonder her book was on the shelf. I wondered who would actually buy it; Evil women who hate their husbands? Men with a real lack of self-esteem (only to plunge further down, no doubt,  after reading this treat)? Whoever would read it, believe it or not, the book was there. Although I didn’t actually read the book other than the blurb, I imagined later that there would be a chapter dedicated to spitting in there. I would have to say spitting is possibly the Number One least attractive thing to see a guy do. Although let’s not dwell on possible alternatives.

Well, well, well…that’s a week gone already. Yesterday I had my first reporting assignment by myself, which I was truly excited and I really didn’t want to mess up. If Marlene were to walk into the room right now, I would give her the biggest hug I have ever given, my shorthand has proved to be SO useful and meant that I was able to interview a couple of people at the end of the conference without looking too much like an idiot. Hoorah! for getting up at stupid o’clock for those classes.

Most evenings I have got in quite late, grabbed my swimming stuff and headed for the pool. On Wednesday evening there was just me and another guy in the pool but I was quite quickly disconcerted by what he was doing. He would flop himself horizontally onto the water, with his arms stretched out over his head and start flapping his body like he was trying to turn into a mermaid. This went on for about 15 minutes until he said to a member of staff that he couldn’t swim (the water is only 4ft deep). I carried on swimming for a while but it was no good, I had to say something (I doubt that surprises many of you). We started chatting and I asked him whether he had taken any swimming lessons at school. No, he said, but a friend had taught him to float and now he was practising. Within about fifteen minutes, I was trying to teach him Doggy Paddle (hey- you’ve got to start somewhere) and we were actually quite successful. The guy was actually moving from one side of the pool until about halfway. I felt quite fulfilled.

Mum, maybe you should stop reading the blog for this next bit. And anyone that might worry, so probably Danielle, Mads and my sisters. But Nikhil has a bike in Chennai which he is borrowing from his friend. I have to say, I’ve never really seen the attraction to bikes (apart from the hairdryer with wheels Diccon and I hired while we were in Thailand) but I went on it for my first time yesterday and had a lot of fun. It’s definitely the best way to see the city and much more fun than a rickshaw.

With my one day weekend (I was working today) I think I might try to go to the beach tomorrow.

Thanks to everyone who is reading this, it’s great to read the comments and see that I’m not just typing into cyber silence.

Pom x

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